I was out getting frozen yogurt tonight with Joy. I ran into an old friend. Here's our conversation:
Heidi: Hi Mark (name changed)
Mark: Hey! How are you?
Heidi: I'm great, how are you?
Mark: I'm good. Have you met my wife?
Heidi: no, I haven't....
Mark: She's right here
Heidi: (waiting for introduction, acknowledgment, ...anything). Hi, wife. I am Heidi, what is your name?
Meridith: "Meridith" (scowling)
Heidi: (uhhhh, okay. No hello...no smile...nothing).
Meridith: How do you know Mark?
Heidi: J Dawgs
Mark: High School
Heidi: well, both I guess
Meridith: Oh, Mark is always telling me about J Dawgs...(sweet, a loyal customer)...He is always telling me that I need to go...(that's nice, I'm flattered)...and I say "no way"...(excuse me?)...I totally HATE hot dogs...(huh? what? hold on here)...I think they are so gross...(did I just hear that right?)
friend with them: OH! Give me five! I totally hate hot dogs too. I think they are so nasty. I don't know how anyone eats them.
Mark: Heidi owns J Dawgs.
Heidi: Um, yeah I do.
Meridith and friend: (despite hearing that we OWN a hot dog stand and make our living selling hot dogs, continue talking about how much they hate hot dogs).
wife of friend: I don't like hot dogs either, but I love J Dawgs. They are the only ones I'll eat (finally, someone with something positive to say).
Heidi: yeah, a lot of people say they don't like hot dogs but they like J Dawgs actually.
Meridith: Oh, not me. I really don't like hot dogs...(is there a reason she keeps insisting she despises my entire life?)
Heidi: (still baffled) ok, well, see you later. Sure was nice to meet you.
I should have got her number because I'm sure we'd be best friends. We totally hit it off.
Actually, I hope she chokes on a piece of lettuce.