my ten year high school reunion is coming up, and i can't figure out if i want to go or not.
here's a little history. i moved to utah in 8th grade. i hated it. i missed california. i was completely lost in social circles. it was different here--people didn't like me
just because i was mormon. i had to be something--in the band, on the soccer team, etc. and even though i was involved in some of those activities, i never really quite found my stride. my best friends were a year older than me--i really don't think i had and real close friends in my grade in high school.
high school just wasn't my thing. i was awkward, clumsy, loud and nerdy. i was still really trying to figure out just who i was. i know that's normal--but with 6 older extremely talented, smart, and beautiful sibblings it took me a long time. i don't really feel like i found me until i reached college.
timpview is just a bit different than other schools. it tried very hard to take in a mixture of people from provo, but the reality is that most everyone drove fancy cars, wore expensive clothes, and was super polished. when i moved from california, i refused to shop anywhere but savers where i could find old grateful dead shirts and ragedy jeans.
this is one of the reasons i love living in springville. i don't run into many people from my high school. because this is always how the conversation goes:
me: "hey, do you remember me--we went to high school together?"
person: blank stare
me: "i'm heidi...last name..."
person: blank stare...
me: "at timpview...."
person: "what year did you graduate?"
me: "1999--we graduated together"
person: blank stare...
and, i don't even have that great of a memory.
so my ten year reunion is coming up, and they keep asking for a head count. it's going to cost us $80. i'm in touch with almost everyone i want to be from those days (i did find two fantastic friends who i lived with at different times at BYU). i really don't want to introduce myself 400 times and get the blank stare. i'm going to be big and pregnant. jayson isn't interested in going at all. most of the time i'm not either.
but then there are times when i can't seem to let go of it.
to go, or not to go?